my world enchanted
landa; eighteen; attached lesbian; kansas city; kansas; live with my daddy; baby named sango; kid named storm; crochity old lady kiddy; generally here hanging out or somewhere else with elsbe; love music; college freshman; undecided major.
everything i dreamed
elsbe; evanescence; inuyasha; rachel; cauterize; dashboard; daddy; sango; kiddy; music in general; gamecube; online games; block breaker on the cell; ashley; kristen; sai; mika; sheryl crow; katie holmes; women of substance; gravitation; what few friends i have; slight thunderstorms; cool rain on my skin in the summer; the feeling of falling in love.
my life in shadow
boys who will never be men; men who will never be boys; homophobia; closed-mindedness; the feeling of falling away from love; seeing someone walk away; reaching for air; losing what little friends i have; fighting with someone; feeling like a mooch; severe thunderstorms; losing touch; feeling alone; living alone; always being wrong; crying.
ok everyone, i'm going on about three hours of sleep right now, so i'm sorry for any typos that happen to come up in here. i just wanted to se if i could hurry up and get this typed up before i forgot. yes, this is more than likely the most controversial poem i've ever written, and i have no idea why the hell i wrote it. i kinda just...did, heh. have fun, i'm typing this up and more than likely passing out again.
will you still be mine
laying here, just looking up
and thinking about us
wondering if there's a way for me
to earn back some of your trust.
i didn't mean to lie to you,
things just got out of hand.
is there a way to prove to you
i'll always want you as my man?
i never thought one little lie
could produce all of this.
it really wasn't what you thought,
he's the one who started that kiss.
yes, i know, i kissed him back,
but it just felt so right.
it was one innocent kiss...
then he turned off the light.
he looked at me, took off his shirt
then on the floor went mine.
we started making out
and it all just felt so fine...
his hands went down to his belt,
and then it all hit me.
as he stood before me and dropped his pants
that this wasn't meant to be.
i stood up and grabbed my shirt
and started to walk out
but then he came behind me
and i just turned around.
before i knew what happened
he had me against the wall.
e started making out again,
but this time, that wasn't all.
at some point amidst all this,
he took my pants of too.
and as i felt him...well...you know,
he kissed me, and i yelled out for you.
he then stopped and looked at me,
i realised what'd been done...
that so-called best friend of yours
had gotten a little fun.
he said sorry and got off me
and then put on his shirt.
i just lay there, on my back
feeling lower than dirt.
i could have said no, fought him off
and saved us from all of this.
who wouls have ever thought
that this could happen...from just one kiss...
as i lay here, crying,
i think back on that night.
i wonder what he told you,
i wonder if it was right.
i love you, i always will,
and i expect you to be mad.
but the fact of the matter is
you're gonna be a dad.
i dont want him to know it's his...
he'd like that too much,
that he had accomplished something
in his moment of lust.
but, i want you forever in my life
whether or not this had been done
because, it's only in your arms
it feels right watching the setting sun.
i can't see myself with him
or anyone else but you.
i guess, right now, i have to hope
that you still feel the same way too...
- landa daniels // june 19, 2002
layout and all content İcoyotesabre 2005. images manipulated in paint shop pro 8, obtained through yahoo search.