my world enchanted
landa; eighteen; attached lesbian; kansas city; kansas; live with my daddy; baby named sango; kid named storm; crochity old lady kiddy; generally here hanging out or somewhere else with elsbe; love music; college freshman; undecided major.
everything i dreamed
elsbe; evanescence; inuyasha; rachel; cauterize; dashboard; daddy; sango; kiddy; music in general; gamecube; online games; block breaker on the cell; ashley; kristen; sai; mika; sheryl crow; katie holmes; women of substance; gravitation; what few friends i have; slight thunderstorms; cool rain on my skin in the summer; the feeling of falling in love.
my life in shadow
boys who will never be men; men who will never be boys; homophobia; closed-mindedness; the feeling of falling away from love; seeing someone walk away; reaching for air; losing what little friends i have; fighting with someone; feeling like a mooch; severe thunderstorms; losing touch; feeling alone; living alone; always being wrong; crying.
ended up skipping everything but theory today. felt.. and still kinda feel... sick. i feel bad about it as i've missed so much of all of the classes i have on mondays and wednesdays that i shouldn't miss any for any excuse anymore, but i couldn't help it today. it was either leave, or have the possibility of throwing up on a keyboard. i don't think that jerry would have appreciated it too much if i were to have thrown up on one of the keyboards in the lab while practicing today.
i got my computer back... with everything gone from it. it was back to its factory settings yet again. so, i did what any self-respecting landa would do and ran in my room crying after turning it on and finding this out. it was a day that had started out badly and ended just as badly as it had begun. there were bits and pieces of fun, but it wasn't enough to overshadow everything else that day. which i won't be getting into, as i purely don't feel like re-living it through writing right now.
now i'm sitting around waiting to see when elsbe might come over, as there's been the promise made of watching a movie today. in the process i'm re-downloading some of my music and updating all of my programs again, and trying to remember what songs i'd had on my favourite playlist on media player since i'd really wanted to burn that list. what's sad is that i can barely remember what was on it... let alone burn it, since i'm not sure what it was. all of my new inuyasha music and the evanescence songs that i had discovered within the past month are gone, which bothers me as i'm not sure where i'd found that music.
..bah. i'm gonna... go play a game or something... and pretend that my stomach doesn't hurt.
right now
singing: my immortal (dj gabriel's mix) // evanescence
talking to: you
wishing: i'd missed a thursday and not a monday
feeling: sickish
wanting: movie
layout and all content İcoyotesabre 2005. images manipulated in paint shop pro 8, obtained through yahoo search.