my world enchanted
landa; eighteen; attached lesbian; kansas city; kansas; live with my daddy; baby named sango; kid named storm; crochity old lady kiddy; generally here hanging out or somewhere else with elsbe; love music; college freshman; undecided major.
everything i dreamed
elsbe; evanescence; inuyasha; rachel; cauterize; dashboard; daddy; sango; kiddy; music in general; gamecube; online games; block breaker on the cell; ashley; kristen; sai; mika; sheryl crow; katie holmes; women of substance; gravitation; what few friends i have; slight thunderstorms; cool rain on my skin in the summer; the feeling of falling in love.
my life in shadow
boys who will never be men; men who will never be boys; homophobia; closed-mindedness; the feeling of falling away from love; seeing someone walk away; reaching for air; losing what little friends i have; fighting with someone; feeling like a mooch; severe thunderstorms; losing touch; feeling alone; living alone; always being wrong; crying.
last night i went from completely stressed to watching it all pack up and leave in about five seconds, it seems.
oh look, it's over there now! bye! have fun on your trip! be sure to pack everything up... it's not a fucking vacation, stay over there for good!
yes, i believe that's what i said around eleven thirty when i was standing at her car before she left. it felt like a friday to both of us. dammit if only it were... it was comfy. i don't think i've ever felt so relaxed while laying with someone before in all my life. felt nice (essentially) holding someone (or essentially being held) and talking... or dozing off when possible. the night before last i had a mini-breakdown, which i won't be getting into, and last night made it seem so far away. i'd just needed someone there to lean on and tell me that it was alright, and i had that for a while.
when you see this, i'm glad you stayed after dinner. really.
...
i had a whole lot that i was going to say, but all of a sudden it just disappeared. not exactly the most fun concept in the world. though i need to be going anyway, there's english things to gather so they can be turned in today.
right now
singing: the reason // hoobastank
talking to: you
wishing: time froze last night... it was comfy, dammit
feeling: quite happy
wanting: a bit more sleep
layout and all content İcoyotesabre 2005. images manipulated in paint shop pro 8, obtained through yahoo search.